Results tagged “breast augmentation” from Marilyn Sewell

Everybody's hurting--economically, I mean.  Or at least, they think they are.  Rich people, poor people, and all the people in between.  And cities and states are slashing their budgets drastically, as well.  But let's stop kidding ourselves: who is really taking the hit?  It's, as per usual, the most vulnerable in our society.  The cuts come in education and in services to poor people.  Health care for indigent families gets sliced, and college loans for young people who want to better themselves.

I read in the newspaper that in tight times, the call for cosmetic surgery is down.  It appears that 25 percent fewer people since 2007 want to have their fat siphoned off with liposuction.  Twenty-one percent fewer want their stomachs "tucked."  Breast augmentation is still, well, relatively big, with a loss of only 11 percent. 

So one woman is complaining because she can't really afford that blepharoplasty (that would be "eyelid surgery") this year, while another woman is wondering how she's going to feed her children that evening, if she pays the electric bill. 

Imagine this: a group of people are on a luxury liner cruising the ocean, and they suddenly see a small craft, sinking in rough water, the family on board calling for help.  Would the liner just cruise past, with the passengers complaining about the minor jostling of the rough sea--or would they do everything possible to save the family?

Or suppose a well-to-do family went on a picnic, and on their grassy path, they came upon children who had not eaten all that day and who were asking for food.  Would not they open their bulging picnic basket and share their food with these children?

Sometimes I think those of us who have plenty simply suffer from lack of imagination.  We somehow have the idea that we deserve what we have.  Who deserves anything at all?  We live through grace and the work of many others.  Or another way of looking at it--who does not deserve?  Who does not deserve food and shelter?  Which human beings do not deserve this?

People say, "I work hard!"  I say I know people who work twice as hard and don't make enough to live on.  People say, "Poor people are just lazy," and I think of the young Hispanic man who is busing their table at the restaurant, or the maid from Puerto Rico who is cleaning their toilet in the hotel, and who will take the bus home late at night to a small rented house where eight others live. 

Perhaps compassion comes down to nothing more than specifics.  Numbers, statistics--how boring!  So let us leave the abstract and be present with the real.  Let us notice the hole in the shoe, the fly on the wound, the limp in the walk, the shout in the night.  Let us notice, and care.

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I read the NY Times regularly, for their in-depth coverage of the news.  And from time to time the Times publishes feature articles about cultural trends--mainly in Manhattan, and mainly among the rich, it seems.

I have read about parents who spend $25,000 on their 6-year-old's birthday party.  I have seen an article about women who are having foot surgery so they can wear the latest Jimmy Choo creations.  I know that some 12-year-olds have their own interior decorators.  And now an article appears about the demands that some brides are making on the attendants at their weddings (7/24, p. E3).

A Ms. Knauer, 35-year-old owner of a staffing agency in Manhattan, is offering "cosmetic interventions" for those in her bridal party, including her mother and future mother-in-law.  Each woman will receive a facial assessment by an "aesthetician" and will be able to go forward with a treatment plan before the December wedding.

No longer is it enough for a bridesmaid to get her hair done by a stylist and wear a ridiculous-looking dress that will never see the light of day again, but now some brides are "gifting" their attendants with dermal fillers and tooth-whitening.

Another bride went a step--no, several steps--further when she told her attendants that she had found a doctor in L.A. who was willing to do four breast augmentation operations for the price of two, and she would like them to go under the knife.  One of her attendants, Becky Lee, commented, "We're all Asian and didn't have a whole lot of cleavage."  Ms. Lee felt that the bride's request was excessive and opted for a push-up bra. 

But such bizarre requests apparently are not confined to New York alone.  Two weeks ago, a company called Health Travel Guides exhibited for the first time at a Dallas Bridal Show.  "We received 30 requests for quotes among the bridal show attendees--mostly for plastic surgery such as liposuction and breast augmentation," said Sandra Miller, the company's representative. 

Texas, I can understand.  Like New York, Texas has some folks who have more money than good sense.  But New Jersey?  A Ms. Goldberg tactfully broke the news to her mother-in-law-to-be that her son's chosen one would like her to get rid of the crow's feet marring her face before the Big Day.

All I can is that if my son's beloved asked me to do that, I would take my son aside and have a heart-to-heart talk with him.  I would say, "Son, I feel obliged as a mother to warn you.  I will say this only once.  You're about to marry a woman who doesn't like herself the way she is, and never will.  She is a woman who will spend the household money foolishly.  She may never want to have children, because of course the little tikes are demanding and do some damage to a woman's girlish figure.  She may spend more time staring in the mirror than looking at you.  I cannot tell you who to marry or not to marry, and I will of course support you, and your bride, whatever you decide to do.  But know what you're getting into."

And a final word now for brides to be, and women in general.  You will get old, unless you die young.  Eventually, no matter how many skin treatments you get, you will die.  You will not be remembered for your smooth, unwrinkled face and your big breasts.  You will be remembered, or not, for your capacity to love, for how completely you can give yourself to something beyond yourself. 

And you can put your money on that.  

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