Need Help With Forgiveness?

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One of the most difficult of all human tasks, emotionally and spiritually, is forgiving those who have harmed us.  I suppose the difficult part is that we are human, and it is natural to want to strike back and hurt this person in return. Because so many of my congregants found my sermon, "Slouching Toward Forgiveness" helpful, I decided to expand upon it and to write a book on the subject.  The book is small and unpretentious--indeed, I do not claim to have perfected myself in this regard--but it contains the essence of what I have discovered thus far in my own search for understanding and practice.  The book is entitled simply A Little Book on Forgiveness, and it is now for sale in our own Beacon Book Store.  I will be doing a book signing on Nov. 30 and also on Dec. 14, for this book and for my other titles, which the bookstore carries. 

To give you a taste of the content of the new book on forgiveness, I'm going to reprint a few passages here in today's blog:

"Forgiveness asks us to go beyond that understandable impulse to judge and to punish.  It is a softening and healing of the heart, in response to pain or injustice.  It is a gift, not to the offending party, but to ourselves . . . ."

"Forgiveness is not just a single act, but is a way of being.  I believe that this way of living--living, that is, with discernment but not with judgment--is our best chance as human beings to find at last the peace of body and soul that we seek in vain, through other means."

"Forgiveness is a profound act of self-healing.  It allows us to make choices for our lives that we could not otherwise make, to make room for joy, for love.  Yes, as we forgive, we find that we are no longer defined and controlled by our pain and sadness . . . ."

"We need not be surprised if forgiveness is difficult, or if it takes a long time.  We need not feel guilty about our struggles to forgive.  We are not bad people because we struggle in this way.  We are just human.  We simply cannot will ourselves to forgive.  Quite honestly, I think forgiveness is an act of grace."

"We grow in compassion as we reflect upon our own lives and circumstances.  We realize that even our best-intentioned, most spirit-led decisions have the capacity to hurt others, including those we love."

"Each of us, no matter what our circumstances, has a rock-bottom choice to make, and that choice will determine the character and direction of our lives.  We can decide to be on the side of love, or not."


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